IMO, Jesus was simply a faithful Jew who was looking forward to the Jesus king of kings shirt resurrection of covenant Israel so it could fulfill God’s gospel promise. Jesus took it upon himself to preach God’s gospel to backslidden Jews, in an effort to build up the corps of believers who would commit to following an anointed leader to the resurrection of long fallen covenant Israel. I was 2 yrs old during this experience. I pray that Yeshua convicts you of how wrong you are, and that HE makes himself so real to YOU that you stop seeing him as simply a lie of the power of suggestion. You, obviously, were never saved, but instead only latched on to the “peace” brought on by others having peace. This is not salvation. Salvation is a relationship where you are quiet and ALLOW Yeshua to actually speak to YOU instead of YOU dictating to Him (as my dad does. He doesn’t have much of a relationship because he dictates.) God can only be real in your life if YOU allow him and don’t bow down to all the junk that goes on the Christian church.
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This junk includes finger-pointing, judging, praying on of hands WITH praying stupid stuff over people that is Jesus king of kings shirt NOT even of God. For example, praying out of someone’s life, everything that Christians find to be distasteful (mostly because Christian worship comfort zones and ChickCow’s. If you believe in God and believe that you end up with Him ultimately, and you believe in his eternal power and identify yourself with Him, as Jesus did, then you are literally not of this world and could perform the miracles that Jesus performed. The reason atheists, moreover why anyone, does not believe in Jesus is that we are afraid of loving others as ourself, of living out the golden rule, of being truly happy in the world and simultaneously overcoming death.